Miles Run: 2
Beers Consumed: 0
Bruises: 1 on my arse, 1 on my thigh, 1 on my arm (all from last Sunday’s scrimmage)
When I am in shape and running and someone honks at me, I smile. I admit it. It’s nice to get a honk every now and again. It’s also funny to look at who honked at you, especially if it’s like a high school kid who looks at you and grins after he dones it. I can’t help but think – oh kiddie, you have no clue what you just did. It grosses me out when it’s a dirty old man without teeth. I’ve had a woman honk at me too and she was pretty cute. However, when I’m out of shape and can feel my face burning bright red, shorts riding up my jiggling thighs and bangs fighting to reach out in every direction, I think honkers are assholes taunting me to get my butt in gear as my mind rambles on: “You freaking asshole – at least I am out here running and trying to get in shape as you eat your Big Mac, smoke your cigarette and drive to your next refreshing, delicious beer.” Of course, I have no idea if any of this is actually happening. For all I know it could have been a friend simply trying to say hello or someone thinking I look good. But honestly, I don’t care at that point.
Luckily, the honker on my last two mile run did not deter me. He/She did not make it easier, but it did give me something to think about on the run home. Another question that popped into my head was how you honk your horn and what it means. If someone honks the horn quick – it’s usually nice. Long and hard is mean and frustrated. A couple of toots of the horn and that’s a “hey, what’s up?” So, usually, it’s a double hink while running, so are people just trying to say hello?
None of this actually matters. Some people hate honking and some could care less. Just do me a favor, before you honk, wait til I am up to five miles. I won’t be as irritated.